He Said, She Said: GOP Edition.

It’s no secret that the GOP hopefuls have already managed to turn Campaign 2012 into a complete three-ring circus. Everyday, I shudder to think that anyone would even take them seriously. But for now, all I can do is laugh (sort of), and hope that the smoke clears next year. Here are a couple of my favorites from the “Are they serious?” file:

Rick Perry says: “I don’t know how you would do this, but if you could take Herman Cain and mate him up with Newt Gingrich, I think you would have a couple of really interesting guys to work with.”
Jenn says: I hope this resulting super-spawn is better at math than you are. Also, be careful with statements like that, lest people start believing you’re pro gay marriage.

Michele Bachmann says: “I will tell you that I had a mother last night come up to me here in Tampa, Florida, after the debate. She told me that her little daughter took that vaccine{HPV}, that injection, and she suffered from mental retardation thereafter.”
And the follow-up: “I have no idea. I am not a doctor, I’m not a scientist, I’m not a physician. All I was doing is reporting what this woman told me at the debate.”
Jenn says: Right, so, shut up. And stop fear mongering. Tossing factually incorrect, marginalizing statements out into the world like that is dangerous, and ethically reprehensible.

Rick Santorum says: “[Gay marriage] threatens my marriage. It threatens all marriages. It threatens the traditional values of this country.”
Jenn says: And I believe that threat to your marriage involves answering a personals ad, and a subsequent pants-down situation in an airport bathroom. Let’s face it, anyone that perseverates on one issue the way you do about gay rights, has something to hide.

Mitt Romney: “The president’s party wants to try and take from some people and give to the others. That isn’t the way to lift America.”
Jenn says: You’re right, Mitt. Because if there’s one thing this country was NEVER founded on, it’s the idea that people should come to the aid of others in need. Also, it’s interesting you take this stance as a member of the LDS church, where you gladly fork over your required tithe, for the exact purpose of distribution to others (or the hateful campaigns they launch- support of Prop 8, anyone?).

These people want to run our country, my friends (although, I think Santorum’s out now, thankfully). Yes, these people, the ones who rail against the idea of federal government, yet are campaigning for the presidency. So, as I’ve said before, pay attention to the issues and the platforms, and for the love of Ted Kennedy, VOTE.